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lesson bookUNIT 1 — Lesson 1A
Parts of the Introduction

 
 

Here are some example pairs of thesis statements. The first statement is a weak example and the second statement is a strong example.


Broad Topic: Reasons to dislike going to the dentist

Thesis Statement Example

Weak

Going to the dentist can be painful.

Strong

Going to the dentist can be painful if you have a tooth pulled, a cavity filled, or a root canal.

Explanation: There is no direction in the first statement. It does not tell the reader what will be discussed in the essay. The second statement outlines three reasons why going to the dentist can be painful.


Broad Topic: Differences between growing up in rural and urban areas

Thesis Statement Example

Weak

Growing up on a farm was safe, I learned a lot and I enjoyed it.

Strong

Growing up on a farm was a safe, educational, and enjoyable experience.

Explanation: The first statement lists the three points in the essay, but they are not in parallel form. The second statement lists the three points, and all three points are parallel, in adjective form. Parallel structure is an important writing technique. It is easy to read; it reinforces the similarity between ideas by using similar grammatical forms; and, it has a strong tradition in English writing that adds significance to the ideas being expressed.


Broad Topic: School uniforms

Thesis Statement
Example

Weak

School uniforms are bad.

Strong

Wearing school uniforms inhibits individuality because students are not given an opportunity to express themselves.

Explanation: The first statement does not have a controlling idea, and it is not clear why school uniforms are bad. The second statement gives a clear explanation of what the writer is going to talk about.